I guess I’m just going to start from the beginning, to give a bit of background. I grew up with a couple of different pets. Mostly cats. They were all Amazing in their own way and I love all my pets still to this day. But.. Ever since I was little, I have ALWAYS wanted a black cat. I was really interested in Sabrina, and other witches with their black cats for some reason. While I was in my early 20’s I found that I had a knack for… Making feral cats friendly. It started by rescuing a pack of 3 kittens and just went on from there. I started working with older ferals.
My second rescue was this beautiful blue grey cat. She was extremely emaciated by the time I got her use to me. I made my parents front porch into a makeshift cat rescue. Got her in good health and gave her a safe place to live where she could come and go as she pleased. She surprised me by being pregnant. Haha she had 5 kittens. One of them ended up being all black with a single strand of white hair. I re-homed all of the kittens and the momma cat except for this one all black male cat. He had the brightest green eyes and we ended up having a bond that was so strong I felt like.. he was practically made for me.
We named him buck and would call him Spooky man a lot of the time. Now, he was by No means the sweetest cat I’ve ever had. He had that wild alley cat in him. He was extremely picky about the people he liked, but he’d melt like butter in my hands Every Time. Haha He followed me everywhere. We had such a great relationship that my husband would poke fun and say that Buck didn’t just love me, but was in love with me. Lol I had him for 9 years.
This last September, I noticed that he was losing weight and… I believe that my husband and I were just in denial or something because, every time I’d bring up that I thought something was wrong with him, he’d say No way! He’s a tough cat. His weight normally fluctuates around this time of year… And I’d agree. Then his weight loss got too severe to ignore.
In November, the day that I called to make a regular appointment, he ended up passing out on me. It wasn’t like a seizure. It was like he died and then came back. I was pregnant and hyperventilating, called my husband to let him know that I had to go to the emergency room and he had to meet me there to pick up our toddler son.
We ran test after test. It came back being cancer. His entire abdomen was filled with so much fluid that, you couldn’t see his organs. He was only 9.. I was expecting his thyroid or something fixable. When I saw this.. it was almost like this calm came over me and I knew that it was just his time even though… It was the last thing I wanted. He was ready, and I had to help him stop the suffering. I made the appointment for his euthenasia that day. We spent a couple more days with him and every day just got worse. He refused to eat, stopped using the bathroom and just laid there the majority of the day. I doubted my decision every single minute after making it. He went so quick and so peaceful when all was said and done.
The day we took him in for his euthenasia was the 1st time I had an experience with his spirit. We got home and the second after opening the front door, I heard him meow. Now, I’m pretty sure that every single pet owner can understand each of their pets having a different voice and knows how to tell one pet from the other. My 2 indoor cats had just woken up from a nap by the time I looked at them. It was like they were waiting for us to come home. The stray was even sitting on top of his house on our front porch. But I knew this was Buck.
After that day I was constantly seeing him out of the corner of my eye. He’d follow me around everywhere. So I’d see him constantly in his spots, would go to look head on and, he wouldn’t be there. A couple of nights later my son had woken up in the middle of the night. I did my normal motherly thing. Got him a drink and tucked him in bed with me in order to get him ready to be put back to sleep. As I leaned back I saw the shadow of a cat leap across my bed. I could make out the face, ears, chest, and front legs that faded into his back abdomen. It scared the crap out of me. But I figured it was just Buck. I continued to see him out of the corner of my eye. My other 2 cats were acting like they’d see him too. I’d notice his brother from another mother, Ziggy, lay in their spot where I last saw them laying together and he would just kind of stare forward. Sometimes he’d follow something that I couldn’t see.
I will say that one of the most impressive experiences is one that my husband had. My husband was NOT at all a believer in ghosts and spirits. He soon changed his mind after hearing mine and having some of his own. He came in from the garage one day. I was standing there in the kitchen getting something ready and I could immediately tell that he was puzzled.
He stopped in the door way and said… I.. I just saw a black cat run under the car. I checked and.. there’s no cat. I asked him if he checked the shelves Because, sometimes the strays like to lay up in the shelves on the days we have the garage open. He said he did and our garage wasn’t open to begin with. I told him that it was probably Buck. My husband knew how he’d always liked trying to sneak outside. And the times he’d sneak into the garage, he’d immediately run under the car so the only way we could get him back in was by offering treats. My husband was still in a bit of disbelief.
He shook his head and said, I guess so… I could have sworn I saw a cat though.. that’s why I checked. I just giggled and we went on with our night.
Eventually I stopped seeing him out of the corner of my eye. I find myself missing him a bunch. It’ll just hit me out of the blue. The week of my latest experience happened a couple of weeks ago. That week… I was just missing him like crazy. I couldn’t get my mind off of him not being here anymore and I wished that things could have been different. That night I settled in for a regular nights sleep and was starting to have a regular dream when he just appeared in my arms. He was just staring directly into my eyes. Looked like he almost had a smile on his face. It was so nice having that short moment with him. I immediately woke up after that. I’ve had visitation dreams with past loved ones before and the feeling of love I got during and after waking up was the same. Very powerful.
–Cheryl Masaveg